The Burden of Self-harm

I went to a concert with some of my friends a few days back. Me and one of my friend were feeling tired. So both of us went to a calm and quiet place. We thought about taking a break from enjoying the concert and sitting quiet for a while. My friend started using her phone. While she was using the phone I noticed some deep cuts on her left arm. I was shocked to know that my friend has done the same mistake that I’ve made. I asked her, “Why are there cuts on your hands?” She started acting absent minded and tried to avoid the conversation. I thought it’s not a polite thing to be interested about some one’s personal stuff unless they open up by their own. So I was silent. After a while she started talking. She said that one day she had a terrible fight with her little brother about a silly thing. The fault was her brother’s. But her mother blamed her for the situation and beat her with a broom. She locked the door of her room and cried. She saw a piece of a blade on her table. She cut her arms with wrath towards her mother. And the cuts still remain visible on her arm.
This particular event reminded me of another friend of mine. Her boyfriend used to abuse her mentally. He was over protective and arrogant and a real idiot. He used to deprive her from everything. You can’t go there, you can’t talk to your friends, you can’t wear “provocative” dresses and all. He even forbid her to go to the rooftop of her own house. I mean, this is worse than the uncivilized past! She was in mental pressure and tried to commit suicide one day. She tried cutting the vain of her arm and her parents stopped her and took her to a hospital. She broke up with her boyfriend. This was before I met her. Gosh, how much I hated that so called human being after hearing that. I was also in deep mental pressure some months ago. I was feeling down. I told my friend that I was about to cut my arms. She told me, “If you do this I will never call you my friend! I have experienced this. I know how dreadful it is.” But I didn’t listen. With anger and hopelessness I broke a glass and with a  sharp piece of glass I made cuts to my arms. My arms were filled with blood. My parents became very upset.
I strongly believe one day I’ll become the happiest person in the whole world but these cuts of my arm will remind me of my dark times. I’ll be happy and successful but my bad times will remain visible. That sounds really terrible. Everyone is different. Some people are born to destroy other people’s happiness without any reason. Some people will always hurt you. But why would you hurt your own self? Be your own best friend. Never give a damn about how people behaves and find your own happiness. Happiness depends on your perspective and how you handle things. Life is really beautiful, trust me. It is.
After discussing these things, me and my friend were feeling energetic and motivated. We joined our other friends on the concert and started singing on a hilarious tone. A guy from our front looked at us at in weird way first then he smiled and said, ‘It’s okay. Please don’t stop.’ We again started singing on our hilarious tone. Life is beautiful.


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